I’m in a weird place right now.  Some days writing comes very easily.  I’ll be driving in the car and a scripture will pop into my head or a nudging on my heart will happen and the words start forming even before I can sit down at the computer.  It will flow out and it feels really, really good and then… …well, weeks pass.  I think, what if I won’t be able to write the next time I want to?  I guess I’m having that whole blogger “crisis of identity” thing.  Is my blog a ministry?  Is it still a place to share crazy pictures of my girls and tell tales about my journey of Mommyhood?  Is it a place to wax on about my fall shopping wishlist and fun things I find along the way as I try to keep my stylish city girl spirit? The truth is, maybe it can be all of those things.  And, to be honest, I’m still honored and flattered that you would read in the first place.  I often think, blogs are a dime a dozen, aren’t they?  What really sets one apart from the others?  I’ve been a bit addicted to style blogs as of late – outfits of the day and all that – which I find amazing and I guess am vicariously living through since I spend most of my time in yoga pants and tank tops.  These girls that parlay their love of style into businesses and gasp – bestselling books!  I mean, in my dreams!! My girls are going to preschool for three days a week starting this fall.  One more year and Charlie will be in Kindergarten – BIG school, as we call it.  I had a moment where I felt some guilt, like maybe three days a week is just terribly indulgent of me.  But you know, I’ve always, always believed that your children can’t be your world.  You just have to have something else for YOU.  We are better mothers when we can take care of ourselves and nurture our own spirits.  Bottom line, we can’t be our best when we are feeling overtired, over touched, overwhelmed…we are giving giving giving 24 hours a day to little lives that need us to survive.  If you don’t give yourself that grace, that love – well, you all suffer for it, in my humble opinion. So my hope for this fall is that I use my time wisely.  Maybe, just maybe I will actually sit down and write more than once every three weeks. Charlie spent the last week with my parents.  Most of the time if one gets shipped off it’s Ella, so having one-on-one time with my little this week has been really precious.  I think back to 2010 and what a stressful, heart wrenching year it was and here she is in front of me, talking in complete sentences, eating like a house on fire and running everywhere.  Proof positive that God is always faithful.  In the most mundane activities this week – running into Target, etc. – I’ve found myself looking over at Ella and feeling like my heart would burst.  How in the world did this little girl come to be?  How in the world is she half me and half Vann?  Truly, life is such a miracle. And so, looking ahead to the latter half of 2012, Vann and I have the extreme pleasure of getting to go back to the city for not just one, but TWO weddings this year.  To say that I am geeked about it would be a huge understatement.  Chicago is half of my heart, and it’s always a blast to visit, but these two trips involve the celebrations of two dear, dear friends – or really, sisters – so needless to say it will be a year to remember. I would be remiss to leave out that fall and winter are my VERY VERY favorite seasons of the year and yes, it’s a million degrees outside but I’m still dreaming about boots and sweaters and lighting our fireplace and football season and hot coffee on a cold morning and actually feeling like I look cute because why is my makeup falling down my face and I’m sweating in places I didn’t know you could SWEAT?????!!!! I am blessed that each new season here in Texas brings new friendships, new community, new life breathed into this heart of mine.  I can’t wait to see what’s next. Dreaming of 50 degree temps –