I am one of those girls, I admit it. I leave my tree up at least a week or so after Christmas, sometimes more. I know a lot of people want the decorations down and the clutter gone – and I do hate to see an empty tree skirt, presents long unwrapped and paper and tissue recycled – BUT there is something so comforting about those tree lights. The way they warm up a home, give it life, fill your children’s eyes with wonder. Something so simple, bringing about so much joy. Ah, joy. Seemingly hard to come by these days. Even though we spent the greater part of 2012 celebrating weddings, the shadow of death rolled in at the end of the year. Vann and I said goodbye to my Grandad, his grandmother and my great uncle Gus, those close to me lost their beloved family members and 26 lives were taken in the Sandy Hook Elementary School shootings. A dark and dreadful time, to be sure. I wish I had the answers. I wish I knew what to say when someone asks where God is in all of this. Many, many times I feel like a poor witness for Christ. I am an ordinary girl chock full of flaws and insecurities – and yet, somewhere along the way this year I felt the urge to write about my relationship with my God more and more. I have a dream to be recognized for my writing – that is at the most selfish part of me – and in my opinion not much happened on that front this year. But that’s ok, I think. Because if I’ve encouraged one person towards the Kingdom in 2012, well then it would be worth it, wouldn’t it? I’ve been listening to hymns a lot these days, especially Jadon Lavik’s version of Come, Thou Fount. Come, Thou Fount of every blessing
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace
Streams of mercy, never ceasing
Call for songs of loudest praise
Teach me some melodious sonnet
Sung by flaming tongues above
Praise the mount, I’m fixed upon it
Mount of Thy unchanging love
Here I raise my Ebenezer
Here there by Thy great help I’ve come
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at home
Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wandering from the fold of God
He, to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be
Let that grace now, like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it
Prone to leave the God I love
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above Maybe it’s the heaviness of the last few months, maybe it’s the pain I know my friends are feeling as they face a new day of loss, maybe it’s the colder days…whatever it is, I know we can all use a little light, a little peace. The truth is, I don’t have the answers. I don’t know why God allows death to happen. I know He is a good God, a loving God, a faithful God. We may never know why these things happen this side of eternity. Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it. Oh, do I wander. And oh, Lord, I feel it. Friends, there’s hope: the good news of the Gospel is that He has sealed my heart, and He can seal yours, too. No matter what happens on Earth – this, our temporary home – we are promised an eternity in a place where shootings, car wrecks and old age simply do not exist. Isn’t that good news?? Streams of mercy, never ceasing… Mount of thy unchanging love… May the peace and promises of Christ fill your 2013 with hope, friends – may you know the immense and all-consuming love that He so freely wants to give. Happy New Year. With much love and affection,