The very first time I came to Chicago was during auditions for graduate school, February of 2000. I stayed with my good friend Courtney and after I finished “working” during the day, we would party at night and she would show me the finer parts of city living. When I ultimately didn’t make it into the conservatory of my choice, I called Court and told her I was thinking of moving to Chitown. Why not? I was too scared to move to NYC (although that was always a huge dream of mine after spending the previous summer there) and thought that maybe a “second city” would be good for me. I’d have the competition and experience of a big city, but on a smaller scale. And so, about a month after I graduated from Baylor, I shipped all of my plays and acting books, checked six suitcases and got on a plane. I will never forget the look on my father’s face, pressing a $100 bill in my hands as he fought back tears. He was not thrilled about the idea, but Mom, God bless her, told him that I “needed to go”. Now, thinking about my own children leaving the nest is enough to bring me to my knees.Court met me at the airport and we cabbed to Lincoln Park – 522 W. Surf, to be exact. A large studio apartment that I originally planned on living in for a month or so until I found a job, apartment, etc…but ended up sleeping in the same bed with C and not leaving until 10 months later, when we found a two bedroom that we could both make our home. Yes, we slept in the same bed. And it was in the kitchen. And when it was really cold outside, it was pretty darn cold in the kitchen…so yeah, we slept with gloves on. No lie.
Amanda’s Top Ten
My tenure in Chicago has been nothing short of phenomenal, in so many ways. I knew that I couldn’t leave the city without documenting the milestones that defined my 20’s. So, armed with my camera and ready for a wash of memories, I began a blog project that has been my brainchild since last year. Enjoy the ride!!
Counting backwards from 10: Chicago Shakespeare Theater and Steppenwolf Theatre Company
First of all, let me say that I simply ran out of time and wasn’t able to personally snap shots of these two, so internet pics will have to do. As a student at Baylor, what I knew about Steppenwolf was that so many of the great actors that you and I know – John Malkovich, Gary Sinise, Joan Allen, Jeff Perry, William Petersen – got their start at this iconic theatre. Here’s how determined I was to join that illustrious group: my senior year I actually WROTE a letter to Mr. Sinise and SENT IN my headshot. Can you believe that? Having now auditioned there a few times and met the casting director, it is hilarious to me that my 22 year old self thought that Lieutenant Dan would personally call me, “Miss Archilla, we would love to have you join our company.” Where would we be without the naivete and sheer determination of our early 20’s?
Chicago Shakespeare was my ultimate dream. Their cattle call auditions were nerve-wracking; I think we had 90 seconds to do a monologue, and the challenge was always finding something that no one else was doing at the time. I was forever the ingenue, so Juliet, Desdemona and Cordelia were my girls.
Cordelia (from King Lear):
Had you not been their father, these white flakes
Had challenged pity of them. Was this a face
To be opposed against the warring winds?
To stand against the deep dread-bolted thunder?
In the most terrible and nimble stroke
Of quick, cross lightning? to watch–poor perdu!–
With this thin helm? Mine enemy’s dog,
Though he had bit me, should have stood that night
Against my fire; and wast thou fain, poor father,
To hovel thee with swine, and rogues forlorn,
In short and musty straw? Alack, alack!
‘Tis wonder that thy life and wits at once
Had not concluded all. He wakes; speak to him.
Just reciting that brings back a total rush of memories! That was my go-to piece – just the right length and the right amount of longing and heartache.
Through a series of events I ended up getting cast in my first equity (and only, thus far) show, “By the Bog of Cats”, an Irish play that was loosely based on the Greek tragedy “Medea”. From that one show, I met some of the greatest mentors I have ever known, and one of them was Kate Buckley, who at the time was teaching First Folio technique at Chicago Shakes. She was the resident text expert, a brilliant mind, and a very cool lady. I took class upon class with her, did monologue coaching, even performed scenes in front of the Chicago Shakes casting director. My heart literally ached to be on that beautiful stage. I must have auditioned there 15 times.
But the competition was fierce, and I never got my chance. My heart still aches, thinking about the dream I came here to conquer. It will probably always remain a beacon for me, a city on a hill that I just couldn’t quite get to. And First Folio, there’s just nothing like it. It’s like unlocking the most wonderful puzzle – clues from the text like punctuation, capitalization, breath and iambic pentameter – all the beautiful things that simply exist in Shakespeare to show us the hearts and minds of his characters.
My love for Shakespeare will never ever lessen, and I hold that dream in my heart and hope and pray I am able to see it realized again.
Happy 6 months, Baby E!
In the midst of all the craziness, Miss E turned 6 months old. Insane, right? I can’t believe it myself.
She had her well visit last Wednesday, and saying goodbye to Dr. Monroe was the WORST. We will be hard pressed to find a pediatrician as wonderful as she is. Here are Ella’s stats:
Height: 25 1/2 inchesWeight: 13 pounds 15 ouncesThis girl is a tough nut to crack. She only smiles for Charlie…and Poppy. Little girl…I miss kissing that face!!
Charlie
I truly don’t think we could have asked for a more beautiful day last Friday. After a week of crummy weather, the sun came out during our last playdate and wow…there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. You can tell by these pictures that Charlie enjoyed her last visit to our favorite afternoon jaunt, Winnemac Park…and after sliding and stealing other children’s toys we took these three chickies back to Ms. Liz’s house for more playtime in the backyard.
When it was time to leave, Charlie hugged the necks of her little friends and we took our last walk together as a “city” family. We ended up in the square, the center of all neighborhood activity and a magnet for strollers. I let her get out and chase the pigeons, which she loves to do, and as I watched her run, I couldn’t fight back the tears…thinking that her first trip to the square was 3 or 4 days after her birth.
I will be the first to say I am READY for the simpler, easier life that comes with moving to the ‘burbs (attached garages, trust that your belongings will remain in your backyard, a lower cost of living, SPACE, etc.) but the city is special in it’s own way…having everything at your fingertips is something that I will miss greatly. Where else can you pick up your dry cleaning, grab a Starbucks, buy a gift for a friend, return a library book, order sushi and hunt down that bag of dried mango that Lindsay had at mom’s group last week?? Sure, you can do all these things in the ‘burbs with a car…and yes, I know that a lot of subdivisions have gorgeous community centers with pools and walking paths and tricked out gyms…but loading the stroller up and pounding the pavement has been better for me than any therapy could ever be.
I guess that’s what I was thinking while I was crying behind my sunglasses, hoping no one would notice my lips twitching: that this was the last time Charlie would be chasing pigeons through the square, with the cafe on the corner that has the BEST sugar cookies, and the toy store down the block that has the BEST toys and the BEST gifts for our pals…the little German hood that has been like a little piece of heaven for us. I will forever cherish the memories made here.
So, in closing, we got the girls transferred safely to Mimi and Poppy on Saturday and so far they are having a ball. Highlights include: Charlie’s first night in a “big” bed, a trip to the nursery to help Poppy pick out some plants, and the joy of new toys and new books…not too mention some Kengas that Mimi has had stockpiled for just this occasion.
We talked to our big girl on the phone tonight, and hearing her sweet voice (which is something that people always comment on – I just assumed all kids talk like she does), I am further reminded of how greatly God has blessed me in this life. Why He chose to trust me to parent this amazing little person (or people, not to leave Baby E out) is a mystery to me.
The Last Day
This morning I wept in the car on my way home from the gym. Couldn’t help myself…it is Charlie’s last day in the city and my emotions finally overwhelmed me. She will say goodbye to more playmates this morning – it dawned on me last night that Lauren and Elynor were some of the first babies born in my group of friends. It is not lost on me that we are ending her time here with those same sweet girls.
Wednesday it was her dear Emi and yesterday it was her precious Lindsay. A week of goodbyes and I’m the one feeling all the pain.
So today I vowed I would make the most of our time and after our last playdate I am taking them both on one short final jaunt in the jogger…most likely up to Trader Joe’s and back (just about 2 miles). It sounds silly, but the route holds a special place in my heart. When I was down in the depths of post-partum dispair, and longing for some type of physical pick-me-up…I told myself “if I could just make it up to TJ’s…I will have accomplished something.” And I did.
To Be Continued…
Kenga visits the Shedd
The most important person in Charlie’s life is her Pepto Bismol pink penguin, “Kenga.” For those of you who are regular blog readers, I’m sure you’ve seen her: Pink feet sticking out from the dentist’s chair; Sharing a place at the dining room table; Wings flying through the air on a Sunday morning.
We’ve been having a major discussion in our household this week: Could Kenga survive a trip through the wash? To say that the penguin is “weathered” is a great understatement. I can appreciate her current state (I’m not heartless!), but when pieces of (what I like to call) Emergency Costco Lollipop got stuck in her fur, I knew it was time for an intervention.
Fast forward to Mother’s Day and our decision to hit the Shedd for one last weekend family day before both Charlie and Ella head off to Texas. The very first time Charlie laid eyes on Kenga at the Shedd Aquarium gift shop, I knew it was love at first sight. She was 18 months old at the time and had yet to attach herself to a “lovie.” Since that time, Kenga has become the most important “person” in her young life.
You might ask what would happen if some tragedy befell our dear Kenga? Well, the last chance I had to buy a back-up Kenga, I decided to pass — thinking that Charlie’s interest in Kenga would run its course. Needless to say, Charlie now takes that stuffed animal everywhere she goes — and to my great dismay, the Shedd has now replaced all those Kengas with updated ones that have more cartoonish faces and longer wings. Plan foiled. I walked around yesterday with a pang in my stomach, wondering how we would survive a loss so great. After taking a spin with Charlie in the gift shop, new Kenga (NK) came home with us — we’re going to keep her for emergencies.
The good news is that I snaked old Kenga (OK) out of Charlie’s crib for a quick spin through the gentle cycle, and am happy to report that a certain penguin still has all of her flippers and toes.
I guess for now I will just have to rest in the knowledge that “OK” is no longer sticky from lollipop juice. And if we do have a need for “NK,” she is waiting, willing and able.
Tea 4 Two
As our days in Chicago grow shorter we’ve been trying to soak up as much time with good friends as we can. This morning Charlie had the great pleasure of partaking in a very special tea party just for two. Ms. Megan and her mommy, Mrs. Lindsay, wanted to throw the girls a little best friends send-off; a proper goodbye. Not only did our gracious hostesses pour tea and serve cookies and muffins, but a read-aloud of Lindsay’s favorite book, “Fancy Nancy” was included as entertainment.
We were so surprised at how good they both were at the table! They very daintily drank their “tea” (apple juice) from espresso cups (with both hands) and said Please and Thank You. Oh, I’m pretty sure they both snaked some extra cookies, but who cares when your toddler is acting like such a lady.
It was definitely one of those moments I will always cherish. And who can deny the smocked dresses that make Ms. Megan and I both swoon…it will be so hard to leave my clothing kindred spirit (only one of the many reasons I love this girl!)…I know Ms. Megan is a self-described Yankee, but Lawdy, I think she’s a Southerner at heart!
Sweet Girl, or Some Musings
I admit it. I’m kind of obsessed with her these days. You know I love Charlie (that goes without saying) but this sweet baby of mine just gets cuter and cuter every day. It’s true – in 5 days she will be officially 6 months old. It is unfathomable to me. It seems like just yesterday we were navigating the intense stresses of breastfeeding, post-partum depression, and our confined living conditions.
Two out of three of these examples are still in existence; one I carry with me daily and one we will be graduating from in less than 4 weeks. The other one I am far enough away from now to say yes, I would try it again, hopefully with greater success the third time around. Charlie and I spent the morning supervising the hauling away of furniture and the re-arranging of clutter. Just for fun, we moved her crib to the other side of the room and got rid of the changing table…because, after all, she is going to be 3 in September and I am hoping for potty training success this summer. We are about to enter into uncharted waters as she is too big for a pack n’ play and obviously won’t have her bed at Mimi’s house…what to do and how to keep her contained is a mystery to me. I suppose she will experience the novelty of a sleeping bag for the time being. Her “big girl bed” will be set up in our new house…our beloved photog Leigh Wilcoxson is selling us her daughter’s twin bed, mattress, and headboard and the bedding I mooned over forever is currently boxed up just waiting to be opened upon move-in day. Should I also admit that I have the girl’s bathroom finished already? Those towels, shower curtain, bathmats, etc. were purchased last year, before I even knew I was having another girl. Good thing because it’s all hot pink and turquoise, stripes and scrolley details. Oh, and don’t forget the chair rails I want to add in the girl’s rooms and yes, I have the paint colors picked out already.As I putter around the apartment (you know I can’t get too much done until I’m kid-free) it’s fun to daydream about all the things we’ve had to table for the last 3 years. It will definitely be a summer of transition. And back to that sweet baby of mine…well, she’s just the perfect addition to our family. It’s like she’s always been here.
And so It begins…
Didn’t it just feel like I wrote that we were moving to Texas? All of a sudden it’s now a week and a half out from taking the girls to meet up with my P’s. Today Charlie and her very good friend Georgia had to say goodbye to each other…since the Speelman’s are going on vacay and won’t be back before Charlie leaves it had to be today. Definitely more emotional for the mommies (although I will see Ms. Lauren again before I go, thank goodness) – these two most likely expect to play again next Tuesday. For us however, it’s the beginning of a long process of goodbyes.
Vann tells me not to be sad as we know our life-long friends will always be in our lives, but the truth is that our daily “doing life” will look very different a month from now. True, Charlie is blessed to already have a few friends where we are moving, but nothing up to this point can compare to the magnitude of her Chicago community. I know that God will bring about a new community, but this being her first, well…it’s just very special.
Charlie met little GG not too long after she was born. They see each other on a weekly basis and love spending time together. It always makes me laugh when Charlie sees any picture of a baby and yells out Georgia’s name. Before Ella, GG was the first baby in Charlie’s life…I guess you could say she paved the way for any siblings to come! We will miss this sweet girl, and her dear parents…but don’t get me started on THAT.