Two Months and Counting!

Yesterday was Miss E’s 2 month appointment at the pediatrician’s office. Here are her stats:

Weight: 8 pounds 13 ounces

Length: 22 inches

I also got my first true smile yesterday as well! Ella is now pretty steadily going from 10:30 pm to 7 am and is awake and alert more and more during the day. She’s finally grown in to Babygap 0-3 (yippee) and is still sporting the faux-hawk (which you know we hope she keeps). She’s still pretty fussy in the evening but Dr. Monroe said somewhere around 13 weeks she’ll realize it’s fun being outside the womb…and stop being so high-maintenance.

Hmm. I’m not sure that’s possible, being my daughter and all. Here she is with her friend Gertie the Goat (Small Paul courtesy of Ms. Liz!)…

I’m Going Green

We drove Charlie to meet up with Nana and JJ on Sunday. Vann and I were worried that the “hand-off” would be emotional (on her part) and we’d have to stealthily “disappear”. Boy were we wrong! It was emotional (on my part), but she didn’t think twice about it. In fact, I think she was ready to see us go.

She’ll be there for a week, enjoying a change of scenery while I attempt to get the Christmas decorations finally put away and get my head on straight. Before she left I made her try this on, a tried and true Matilda Jane…in fact, one of my very first purchases (when she was only 6 months old). Charlie has been such a pill to dress lately. I think she’s become so used to staying in her pj’s or changing into her daily outfit (yoga pants and a long sleeved tee) that she’s fighting me at every turn to put anything “fancier” on, especially anything involving tights. If she only knew (or cared) how much Oilily is hanging in her closet…Hmm. I guess I should be pretty happy that I have another girl to dress. Actually, Vann will be happy. I am recycling, after all.

Psalms

Psalms 3:5-6 says, “I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me. I will not fear the tens of thousands drawn up against me on every side.”

Man. Isn’t that truth just amazing?

I haven’t been blogging because I just haven’t had much to give. Between caring for two small children, attempting to keep a somewhat organized home, and battling through my own personal demons, I might be at my lowest point in a very long time.

God has been very, very good to me. I am eternally blessed by so many amazing friends and family members. I have a loving husband who really, really tries to make me happy and who provides for our family. I’m cared for and supported.

Sometimes though, in life, it doesn’t matter how many times someone tells you “this too shall pass” or “it will get better, i promise!”…you just have to breathe it in, don’t you? You just have to let those dark thoughts come and sit with them so that you are at your most vulnerable and can rise again.

Here’s what most people won’t tell you about parenting: Sometimes, it really, really sucks. There. I said it. You die to yourself when you have kids, just like you die to yourself at the foot of the Cross. It is messy. It is exhausting. It is draining.

But as those “tens of thousands” draw up to defeat me each and every day, I will continue to lay my sin at Christ’s feet. My sin of anxiety, my sin of distrust, my sin of selfishness. And He will sustain me.

Happy New Year!!

Ok, so Vann and I are pretty lame.

Ella went down after her 11 pm feeding, as usual. Vann was snoozing on the couch after I forced him to watch some of the first season of “Glee” (totally late to the party on that one!). I was standing in the total darkness, terrified to turn the TV back on. Our small space really limits us in that sense, as her room (the office) is right off the den…I didn’t want to risk waking Ella, and I certainly didn’t want to stay up just to watch the ball drop if it meant I’d be pacing the floor with a restless newborn for the rest of the night…so, I went to bed at 11:30.

It’s the first time I haven’t truly rung in the new year in 10 years.

The great part is that at 6:45 am this morning, little Miss E was still asleep in her bed. I actually had to wake her. 10:45 to 6:45 = 8 beautiful hours. She didn’t sleep that entire time, obviously…there were a few times I woke up to hear her grumbling on the monitor…but she’d grumble for less than five minutes and then…silence.

I doubt this will be a trend at this point…could have just been a fluke, but it felt nice, nonetheless. Not too shabby for an almost 8 week old!!

When Vann ran out to pick up our dinner last night he came back and said our neighborhood was hustling and bustling. It’s good to know that the world outside continues, despite how much we might feel like we are stuck in the moment we are currently in. I told him that we will have date nights again…we will have time together as a couple…and we will make it out of the house on New Year’s Eve, possibly even dressed up and looking somewhat like humans.

We decided that last night was pretty indicative of where we’re at right now. What is the most precious commodity coming out of 2009?

Sleep.

Charlie and Ya-Ya

Saturday afternoon our good friends the Rylander’s came over for a visit. Charlie has started calling Olivia “Ya-Ya”, which we think is too cute for words.

Speaking of words, Charlie has been full of them lately. She’s been putting together sentences (“Mommy, what you doing?” and “Mommy, what happened…Mommy?” are just two of the many) and is increasingly verbal. Which, as you all know, is a wonderful thing but also a not-so-wonderful thing, especially when she repeats herself about 15 million times.

My Big Girl

Yesterday’s appointment with the lactation consultant couldn’t have gone better. She was wonderful, and it was great having someone to “advocate” for me (as Vann would say). I’m so pleased to report that Ella is a whopping 8 pounds!!
Turns out I’m actually doing something right. And that feels pretty darn good. If I don’t get anything else done today, at least I know I accomplished SOMETHING… (Thanks, Ms. Jill, for the darling outfit!!)