{"id":95,"date":"2011-05-16T04:38:00","date_gmt":"2011-05-16T04:38:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/2011\/05\/fearfully-and-wonderfully\/"},"modified":"2018-04-21T17:22:26","modified_gmt":"2018-04-21T17:22:26","slug":"fearfully-and-wonderfully","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/2011\/05\/fearfully-and-wonderfully\/","title":{"rendered":"Fearfully and Wonderfully."},"content":{"rendered":"

Saw \u201cBridesmaids\u201d tonight.  HIGHLY recommend.  Warning: crass, rude, all of the things you know you shouldn\u2019t really laugh at but do.  Underneath the bathroom humor there was a lot of warmth and truth and real life.  Truly.  It is an incredibly funny film and Kristen Wiig \u2013 I mean, she might be my new hero.  The girl is brilliant<\/em>.  So I think I might be sabotaging myself.  I know, I kinda just came out with that \u2013 but it\u2019s almost been a year that we moved from sweet home Chicago and I find that I am somewhat afraid to let new friends \u201cin\u201d \u2013 as if I\u2019m just saving myself the rejection I feel I will ultimately have.  Why, I don\u2019t know.  I really, really wish I did.  I miss those \u201call access\u201d kind of friendships.  The kind where you can show up at that person\u2019s house with a bottle of vino and a box of kleenex (at 10 pm, mind you) and just have it out \u2013 not with each other but with LIFE.  It\u2019s probably no wonder I\u2019m struggling \u2013 I spent the better part of my 20\u2019s in the city and I don\u2019t have the luxury of \u201cgrowing up\u201d with the gals I\u2019ve met here \u2013 although, believe me, God has really provided and been faithful \u2013 but I wonder if I\u2019m holding people at arm\u2019s length \u2013 which is SO not like me.  I usually dive in headfirst. Something to examine, to be sure.  Because what if people get to know me and they don\u2019t like what they see? What if? I think \u201cthis\u201d feeling is the feeling I hope to shield my daughters during their childhood\/teenage years.  I\u2019ve been the \u201cnew girl\u201d a lot in my life \u2013 granted, my 33 year old \u201cnew girl\u201d experience is a lot less traumatic than my 15 year old \u201cnew girl\u201d experience \u2013 but still.  If I can help it \u2013 I\u2019d love to know that my girls will not have to suffer the heartbreak of saying goodbye and starting over. Don\u2019t get me wrong \u2013 I know that we are exactly where we need to be and I\u2019m not sorry about moving and I don\u2019t have regrets, at all.  I\u2019m just learning to navigate this new life.  And, just to be clear, this has nothing to do with the outside world but all to do with me.  What, exactly, is stopping me from building meaningful relationships?  What, exactly, am I so afraid of? Here\u2019s the thing: I recognize that as a 33 year old woman and mother of two that my \u201cstory\u201d is a valuable one and that I have just as much to contribute as the next person. A verse I\u2019ve always loved is Psalms 139:14.  It says: \u201cI praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.\u201d Fearfully and Wonderfully<\/em>. So basically with great awe and astonishing wonder, God<\/em> created me<\/em>. Whose voice am I really listening to? <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Saw \u201cBridesmaids\u201d tonight.  HIGHLY recommend.  Warning: crass, rude, all of the things you know you shouldn\u2019t really laugh at but do.  Underneath the bathroom humor there was a lot of warmth and truth and real life.  Truly.  It is an incredibly funny film and Kristen Wiig \u2013 I mean, she might be my new hero.  […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-95","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/95","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=95"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/95\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1238,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/95\/revisions\/1238"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=95"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=95"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/almostjuliet.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=95"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}