Month: June 2010

Selfishness

Someone very dear to me shared some personal struggles with me yesterday. A mom of two little ones, she told me that the fighting between her kids has reached such a peak that she’s been breaking out in hives. The kiddos are at an age where it’s probably time to let them sort things out on their own…but the stress of hearing it has just about sent her over the edge. She also admitted and owned her selfishness and told me that even after all these years she still “wants to do what she wants to do” and sometimes wishes she could put herself first.

Here’s what I love about her confession: She was real and vulnerable, and it made me feel like I’m not alone in my daily thoughts and feelings about being a mom.

I’m not going to lie and say I’ve enjoyed parenting without Vann. Like I’ve said before, my parents have been wonderful: my mom has been breaking her back helping me care for the girls and my dad has become my housing guru…but I’ve about reached the end of my rope. I’ve caught myself screaming at Charlie quite a bit lately. My fuse is very short. And as I’m trying to organize and filter through all of the many facets of home-buying and starting over in a new city, I am starting to feel like I’m alone in the wilderness.

Life is messy. Please don’t tell me that you have it all together and never, ever feel this way. I won’t believe you.

P.S. We close on our house July 9th. In just over a week we will be signing on the dotted line!

Patience…

…Never been great at having it. As I sit here in my parent’s house, waiting for my brain to turn off, I am restless. For the past week we have been in negotiations with the sellers of our (hopeful) soon-to-be new home. A few small things need to be fixed, and all of the back and forth paperwork sure eats up a lot of time and energy.

We all know that money doesn’t grow on trees (or does it?) so prioritizing is the key – but starting from scratch has my mind spinning with ideas. Vann can tell you – I’ve been calling him throughout the day: sharing a great find here and there…telling him what magazines I’ve been looking at…what inspirations hit me at any given time.

So not to get too ahead of myself, but here are just a few nuggets of decor I’m mulling over…

MLP

Iced Skinny Vanilla Latte to fuel the rooting through boxes of years gone by: $4.06 Rubbing alchohol to clean off the somewhat melted My Little Ponies stored in said boxes in a Texas attic for 15 years: $1.25Watching my child play with the greatest toys ever made and loving every minute of it: Priceless

Happy Birthday, Kelly!

Ms. Marla’s little girl had her 4 year old birthday party a couple weeks ago. Apparently all children in Texas are fantastic swimmers. Made me feel a little bit antsy to get Charlie into some classes as soon as we are settled.

P.S. Is it bad form to put a bib on your child even if she’s wearing a swimsuit?

Charlie

Sweet girl. This whole thing hasn’t been very easy for her, I’m afraid. Being separated from Daddy and sleeping in a host of different beds has made for a lot of sleepless nights and a new fear of shadows. My parents have been amazing (taking the three of us in AND all of the “stuff”, not too mention a china cabinet I drug home the other day) but I think we are all ready for a return to normalcy. We postponed potty training under the guise that we’d tackle it during our stay here, but now I’m afraid Charlie will regress if we don’t wait until we are finally settled in a home of our own. I changed her diaper at the mall the other day, and the fact that her legs hung off the side of the changing table was the tipping point for me. I never would have waited this long – but I guess in the end, it’s really when she’s ready, and to be honest, she doesn’t seem like she is.

All of this to say, I’m having a lot of anxiety about it. Like she’ll be wearing diapers to the 2nd grade. I know. Pretty dumb, right? I bought her a book and some “big girl” panties and have been talking up the potty like it’s made of gold. Hopefully, we’ll make a little bit of progress this next month. If not, August is when we crack the hammer. Lock the doors, shut the windows…the Bischoff’s are hibernating for an entire weekend of racing Charlie to the potty every 10 minutes. Sounds like fun, eh?

Blue

Yes, this is the dining room of a house I looked at. Supposadly, it’s owned by a Highland Park trust fund baby and this was her “second” home. I guess it’s been empty for awhile. The price was right – too bad the entire place is painted various shades of blue.

Not that I have anything against blue, mind you, but it would have been a huge expense to get this place back to a neutral state. Love that chandelier, though!
Which brings me to a question: what paint color would you choose for your dream dining room?